Easy: Banana Pancake

Polite	Honest
Guess what happened. We saw a cute hedgehog in the garden. My kids just loved it!
Wow, really? I know there is a hedgehog.	WHO CARES???
Is it your pet?
Oh, no.	Are you kidding me???

Is everything okay?
Ah, not really. I have a terrible migraine.
Oh, dear, I'm so sorry. Do you have medicine?	And what shall I do now???
Yes, I have taken tons of medicine, no help.
It will help, I'm sure. Have a nap.	Take some more and go to your freakin’ room, moron.

Ah, my car broke down.
Oh, no, I'm so sorry. Let me help you. I can call a mechanic. Is that okay?	Oh, no. I have no time for this now. How will you leave then?
That would be fantastic, thank you very much.
No problem.

Guess what happened. I lost the keys at the beach but I found them.
Haha, great news! Lucky you!	Why are you telling/calling me?

Easy